Apr 17 2021

Secrets of bread making

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 16:35

Yes, this is a cooking entry. No, I am no expert. And I’m not gonna’ share any secrets either. I’m gonna’ let this guy do it.

I’m just gonna’ tell you about my experience following his advice and my experience with bread in general.

Two times I’ve watched that video, the first time I cooked the bread as in the second example. It was good, the crust was crispy, and the bread was fluffy and tasty. As it got cold, the crust got hard, but still tasty enough to be worth it.

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Apr 14 2021

I am not a happy drunk

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 2:23

Yup, I am sorta’ drunk. I don’t do this often, I mean, getting drunk and/or writing while drunk too.  But I am aware that alcohol relaxes some boundaries and allows some true thoughts and instincts to come to the surface. And because I am a nutter that doesn’t give a flying fuck, here I am writing a blog post while I am drunk.

I had a chat with some of my dearest friends this week. One of them told me that she had the vaccine and a funny side-effect of it is that she cannot drink more than a quarter of a beer without feeling sick. So… good news for alcoholics, I guess? But this is bad news for her because she has two pre-pubescent children. She needs that beer for fucks sake! The other one told me that a little bit of (Romanian) country wine made the bed swirl with her when she went to bed.

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Apr 10 2021

All is well with the world

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 11:32

… well, not with all of it. Only with mine.

In case you do not have the time to scroll through my blog, and I imagine you don’t after all you have a life and things to do as well, sometimes I repeat certain details. I’ve probably mentioned before, but this blog has started because I was bullied on the university forum. This is how I realized I need a place to write my thoughts where I could control who else gets the right to do this. And my boyfriend at the time was very supportive, so we started this blog together. Then we split, but remained friends, he stopped writing and in time the blog got renamed.

Initially this blog was about my struggles navigating a through life in a traditional country and a male dominated field. In time it became a tool to educate people, to open their minds, to share with them how I look at the world, in the hope that together we can lift each other up and become better versions of ourselves. Because after all, the world is made of people, so changing the world is changing the people

I’ve struggled with a lot of things since this blog was created. My readers have witnessed me breaking down with a broken heart, falling in love only to have my heart broken again. They then witnessed me falling into a deep depression as it finally dawned on me that the tragedy of my relationships is rooted in the past and the defective family I grew up in. And then they witnessed me slowly deprogramming all the shit in my brains with the help of a good psychologist and a lot of supporting friends. Career-wise, you have witnessed me growing from a junior Java developer to a full-fledged architect, then taking a step horizontally as a technical manager and then taking a step back into a Developer role, to be able to do what I want to do – solve problems and create effective solutions.

My readers have witnessed me falling in love with my cat, a cat that learned to open doors and literally stalked me to adopt her. And I now realize she is older than my godson and his sister.

My readers have witnessed me move from place to place, cleaning them up and letting them better than they were for the next tenant. And finally, they witnessed me buying my dream flat, a flat oriented south so it is always well lit naturally. Which is practical since, I’m am pretty much solar powered. And the property the flat is in has a pool and a sauna which are two of my favorite things in the world.

The place is now clean, but it might take a while until I set it up. After all, the lockdown is still enabled here, and I honestly don’t know what to do with it. My parents never had enough money to invest in decorating the places we lived in. Everything was more about the function and less about the look. I am in this new position where I can decide if I want brick tiles on my kitchen walls (I do :D) and what to do with the existing furniture, so it fits.  I am in the position of buying a dining set so I can have at least six people over for lunch, dinner or tea. I am in the position of doing something with the second bedroom.

The world is far from perfect, but I woke up today feeling safe in my little corner of the world. For the moment there is no fight to be fought, no injustice to write an angry article about. I am sure I will find something to rant about soon. But today, all is well with the world.

So, I will take the day to enjoy my achievements, which I never thought possible when I was in my teens. I am thankful to all the people that joined me in my journey so far, as friends, or readers or co-workers.

Take care! Stay safe, stay happy!

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Mar 28 2021

Nature, nurture and paying taxes

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 13:30

I was wasting some time on reddit and found a few entries related to women, relationships and how the possibility of having kids affected the men-women dynamic.

Somebody asked at some point if women are just walking uteruses for men. I’ve replied that yes, because that is the only thing that they cannot do and that I hate it. Some trans people got into the discussion and everything digressed horribly, so I thought I would write a few words here, on my blog, where I am God, where I have the bread, butter and I also yield the knife. :D

Without talking about other genders than male and female, as a heterosexual and a woman, just try to date and put upfront that you don’t want or can’t have children and see how many of the men actually continue the relationship and love you for you, and not for the ability of passing on their genes.

Maybe it’s nature, maybe it’s education, but most men want to pass their genes on and if they can’t, they will deny themselves a partner who fits them perfectly in every other way. To me this behaviour is crazy. Because if we were to take the self-preservation instinct into account, a full-blown adult is a much safer bet than a bunch of to-be-decided ones, that you have to nurture and take care of until they are adults and able to be a support for you. And that is, if they are born healthy and, if society doesn’t fuck them up.

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Mar 22 2021

My rush decisions

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 2:04

A while ago I told you that I bought a flat. The reason I haven’t written anything on my blog in more than three weeks is because I have been busy packing, cleaning the old place, unpacking, cleaning the new place, buy some stuff for the new place, buy food for the new place, cook for the first week of work after moving in. And trying to solve the internet problem and other logistic issues related to my new location.

I’ve moved from Edinburgh, the capital of Scotland, to a little Scottish town named Kirkcaldy which is part of the council area of Fife.

The decision to move was quite sudden and if you ask people that know me, they will say that I do tend to make rash decisions sometimes, but most times, it works out very well for myself.

A few years ago, I decided I wanted to move from the part of Romania where I lived for 25 years, quite shortly after a bad breakup. I did not know where I wanted to go, and I intended to move out of the country initially, but after I got a job in a city very close to where I’ve lived the first 12 years of my life, which I used to consider the most beautiful years of my life, I packed up everything I could, and I moved.

As a side note: getting into that relationship was also a rush decision and that did not turn out so well. But that was the stroke that broke the camel’s back and I’ve finally learned my lesson and embraced solitude until the right person comes around.

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Feb 28 2021

The joke was on me

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 1:26

When I was in high school, while having a beer and a smoke and pretending to be a wiser than my years philosopher, I always joked that I will probably spend my life in a rotten moldy attic writing works of art that will only be appreciated after I die.

At the end of high school, while preparing for my admission exam for the university, I used to joke with my mom about how my front teeth were in really bad shape and wouldn’t it be really ironic if they break before I go to the university. Because if I would go to the university with no front teeth my focus on my studies would be insured, because no man would be interested in me and divert my focus.

I used to make a lot of jokes about Jesus taking the wheel when I drove.

I always used to joke with my friends about living next to a cemetery. While most of them were appalled by the idea, I was pointing out, jokingly of course, the benefits of it. It would be quiet and there is little chance somebody would build something that would obstruct the view.
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Feb 23 2021

Evening thoughts

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 23:29

I’ve mentioned a while ago that I love the first season of Altered Carbon. I love it so much I had to read the books. The first one was the best, the other two… gradually lessened in quality. Or maybe I was missing the imagination to create the worlds described in the books.

There are probably lot of things in those books that could be considered good starting points for some very long conversations. But there are two paragraphs that stuck with me.

The following paragraph is from the first book and it is about shopping.

“Shopping—actual, physical shopping—could have been phased out centuries ago if they’d wanted it that way. They (people, society) had the capacity back then. Mail order, virtual supermarkets, automated debiting systems. It could have been done and it never happened. What does that tell you?”

“It tells you that people like shopping. That it satisfies a basic, acquisitive need at a genetic level. Something we inherited from our hunter-gatherer ancestors. Oh, you’ve got automated convenience shopping for basic household items, mechanical food distribution systems for the marginalized poor. But you’ve also got a massive proliferation of commercial hives and speciality markets in food and crafts that people physically have to go to. Now why would they do that, if they didn’t enjoy it?”

“Shopping is physical interaction, exercise of decision-making capacity, sating of the desire to acquire, and an impulse to more acquisition, a scouting urge. It’s so basically fucking human when you think about it. You’ve got to learn to love it, Tak. I mean you can cross the whole archipelago on a hover; you never even need to get wet. But that doesn’t take the basic pleasure out of swimming, does it?

Being born poor I hate shopping; I hate ads and I hate people trying to convince me to buy stuff. Some of my friends used to say that shopping is therapeutic, but I’ve never seen it that way. Well, after reading this, I’ve started to accept the activity of shopping as being perfectly human and started enjoying it more.

Even now, when a pandemic is still upon us and a lot of people are still in lockdown, we are buying things from the internet, but we miss the basic action of manually choosing and gathering our own resources. Maybe shopping is a nice way to soothe an yearning that is left from our hunter-gatherer ancestors.

The other quote that I can’t get out of my mind is this one.

Religion is religion; however you wrap it; a preoccupation with the next world pretty clearly signals an inability to cope credibly with this one.

I’ve been raised Romano Catholic. And religion has affected my life in many ways. Bad ways. But while being a devout Catholic, I had questions. And when I was eighteen I got sick of accepting that there are answers, it’s just that some powerful entity decides not to share them with me. One of the things that changed in my whole attitude when religion stopped being part of my life is that I stopped accepting a lot of crap as being part of life and considering that crap an advance payment for my spot in heaven and this made me fight and work harder to improve this life. Will Smith said something similar: if you have a backup plan, you will not work as hard fulfil the main plan.
This is a simple truth that most people tend to ignore when it comes to religion. If you are truly good and worthy, why are you not worthy enough to have a good life on this earth? How much suffering does that heaven cost, really?

And how does life in heaven looks like? Because there is no book describing that in detail. What if I get there and I don’t like it?

Anyway, if there is something to take from this entry is this: learn to enjoy shopping and make this life the best you can for yourself, because the afterlife is not guaranteed.

And read the Altered Carbon books. You won’t regret it.

Stay safe, stay happy!

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