Nov 08 2020

The Trump reign is over

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 1:46

Theoretically the whole world can sleep better because Trump lost the US elections. It’s nice not fearing being nuked because the president did not like your meme.
Americans are joyful on twitter and other social networks, but …
Trump does not know how to lose gracefully, and I expect the army will be needed to kick him out of the White House.
During his “reign” two very narrow-minded idiots have been invested to the Supreme Court: Brett Kavanaugh, a rapist and Amy Coney Barrett, an indoctrinated catholic. Both will probably affect negatively all the progress done on equality until now.

Also, he already screwed US in so many ways, that a 4-year term might not be enough to fix it. It might take two (or more) terms to undo all the Trump fuckups. And Biden might not even have 4 years, because even if he is sharp as a tack, he is very old, and his body might fail him.

And another thing that always bugged me about US: there were other candidates beside Trump and Biden. Pete Buttigieg a smart, young and reasonable veteran. There was Elizabeth Warren a smart woman, younger than Biden, that’s for sure, a damn law professor with a progressive thinking. And there was Kamala Harris, a smart woman too with a good knowledge of the law, considering her previous jobs were district attorney of San Francisco and general attorney of California. And given all these choices of smarter, younger people, US limited its choices to Trump and Biden. Don’t get me wrong, he is the lesser of two evils, but he is still an old man, maybe senile and the best US can hope for is that when dementia will affect him seriously he will have the decency to step down and allow Kamala Harris to take his place.
Considering the US population is so narrow minded and prejudiced, that the only choices for president ended up being two senile white men, avoiding any candidates that were gay, female or colored, it would be ironic to end up with a president that matches two of these prejudices. Also, the supreme irony would be for her to choose Pete Buttigieg as her vice-president. This scenario that I’ve imagined here is probably the only one in which US might actually have a chance at some kind of progress.

Anyway, Americans, rejoice, but keep your wits about you and don’t expect everything to start feeling normal again too soon. US is a huge country, and changing a big country is a very slow process. So, keep your expectations in check to avoid being disappointed.

Stay safe, stay happy!

Oct 26 2020

Spring Boot + Kubernetes = Love (or something like that)

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 22:31

In the previous entry I had a Spring Boot application running in a Docker container. And that is good. But an application designed to be used by a lot of users should be scalable. Well… not the app per-se, but the setup managing it. So, I have a container with an application running. What if more users access it than the poor container with its limited resources can handle? Well, in this case, I need another container with the same application installed and a component called a load balancer that will direct traffic as needed. This is where Kubernetes comes in handy.

Kubernetes is an open-source system for automating deployment, scaling, and management of containerized applications. This means, now that I have an image of my containerized application, I can use Kubernetes to deploy it on more than one container and I can use it to manage my containers. I can decide the resources assigned to a container and I can tell Kubernetes how many containers I want for crowded and lighter situations. Kubernetes can do a lot for me, but I will focus here on something called Horizontal Pod Autoscaler – you can configure one of these to manage a number of containers. As the name of this components says it quite clearly, I can configure it to automatically decide the number of container with my application that need to be up and running based on a specific criterion. And because it is the easiest for me to do, my criteria will be the CPU load percentage. (instead of users requests)
Continue reading “Spring Boot + Kubernetes = Love (or something like that)”

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Oct 22 2020

Cheaters, cheaters everywhere

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 23:56

I’ve been single since 2014. The reason I became so, is because my then boyfriend dumped me for a younger woman with bigger boobs, and unfortunately for him with a bigger brains too. Almost two years later he did the same to her and when I ended in the peculiar situation of consoling her, I found out I have been cheated on, probably most of the relationship. Turns out, my ex had a long duration affair with a work colleague.

So yeah, I missed a very nasty bullet and I don’t regret a thing.

The boyfriend before him, almost did the same thing, but because he was an idiot that could not keep his mouth shut about a younger woman flirting with him, I ended up dumping him. And he finally could consume the affair with his colleague, without the guilt of hurting me over his head. We are still friends, but only because our relationship was based on friendship and we were able somehow to keep that.

While working in various companies, I’ve seen people fall in love at work. The phenomena always made sense to me. People fall in love easily with familiar faces. Also, in an environment that conditions us to show the best version of ourselves, because our chances of being promoted depend on it, it is very easy to fall in love with somebody. But I was always aware of the difference between the work persona and the one at home. Why? Because I was very aware that the real me was quite depressed, with a very low self-esteem and a lot of times, one push away from killing myself.  But rarely these aspects have seeped into my work persona. That is why I was promoted and praised for being an over-achiever a lot of times.  So, if it was like this for me, I concluded it must be the same for everybody, because I am human, and I am not special. So, I formed this ethical work-code that I have always applied in my work life: “Don’t fuck where you eat!”.  Yes, it’s the fuck version of “Don’t shit where you eat!”. Continue reading “Cheaters, cheaters everywhere”


Oct 14 2020

Memory anchor for a kind soul

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 1:56

Before modern inventions such as the photo camera and sound recorder, when a person died, they only lived in the memories of the people they’ve met and left a mark in their lives in one way or another. They truly died, when the last person that remembered them died too. Now we have cameras, we can record smiles and voices, if we use these resources in a smart way, we could keep somebody alive forever. But people need to forget and need to move on.

I don’t know where I read it, but apparently Facebook is a cemetery, there are a lot of accounts of people that are not alive anymore and that did not bother to share the password with anyone. So, they will be alive as long as their internet footprint is. It is morbid but comforting in a way. People that have had their lives touched by people they died, can still take a look at the person that impressed them so much, but that life moved them far away.

I am writing all this because I found out somebody I considered a friend died recently. I’ve met him only a few times, but he was always so kind and so lovely to be around. He had a gentle soul, a poet’s heart and although we lived in cities quite far away from each other, each interaction with him was pleasant. I probably liked him a lot because we shared the passion for music.

The last time we interacted, was in May, we talked on WhatsApp. He wanted me to write a LinkedIn recommendation for him. And I did. And it looked like this.

I have worked with Corian from 2014 to 2018 at BearingPoint. He was member of a team that my team interacted with very often. He was essential in integrating the two products and facilitated communication between teams. He is driven, open-minded, eager to learn and share knowledge. This was reflected in the quality of his work, he went the extra mile to make sure delivery deadlines were respected and the features delivered lived up to the expectations.
He is one of the most reliable and adaptable developers I have worked with. It was a pleasure working with Corian, I would have loved to have him in my team and I have no doubt he will have a wonderful career in software development.

And his reply was: “I love you too”. At first, I was dumbfounded. Nobody said they love me in a long time. And nobody uses those words so easily, I definitely don’t. And why would he write that? I haven’t talked to him in years. And then I realized in my recommendation I used “I would have loved to have him in my team” instead of “I would have liked to have him in my team”. So, he was a little bit sarcastic about that. We had a few funny exchanges and he sent me a link to one of his poems; out of the blue, with no context. I had no idea what to answer. So, I just said “ok ….. thx :)”. Looking at the WhatsApp exchange now, the poem is gone. Must have been an URL and the source was removed. But my awkward reply is still there. Maybe I should have read it with more attention, maybe said something about it. Maybe I should have talked to him more often.

A week later he invited me to his wedding, and I said no… because of the pandemic. Now I’m so sorry I did not make an effort to be there for him.

Almost any trace of him was erased from the internet. Apparently, his family wanted it that way. And although, we did not talk much, and we were not that close I will always remember him fondly. I wish I had more memories of him.

It seems so unfair a person so kind and so young is no more! Life has taken me far away, and probably we would have never met each other again. But, it was nice for the probability to ever meet again to be bigger than damn zero. Uff Cori, why do you have to be just another one of those persons that I will remember just by name in ten years or, so? I wish there was an afterlife for all musicians, because if there were, I would probably meet you there. By then my piano playing will be better and it will be my pleasure to jam with you.

It is being said that a man is not really dead as long as his name is still spoken. We are only truly gone, when we’ve disappeared from the memories of those who love us.

Rest in peace, Corian Paun! The world is poorer without you in it. Your kind soul will be missed, and you will be remembered.


Oct 12 2020

Why Do Online Romance Scams Work?

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 23:32

When opening Firefox tabs, I always see a list of recommended articles from various sites. I pick about one per day to read, the rest I either ignore or just skim through quicky. The one I chose for today is this one.

It is a about a scam artist with a very peculiar niche: older, single and rich women. As I read the article, I couldn’t stop myself from wondering: Why would some people give away money so easily, and especially to people they do not know really well? Also, if you read the articles, there are so many red-flags about him that I cannot believe somebody would be so enamored to give this guy thousands of dollars to “invest”.

He was a gregarious and engaging storyteller, practically brimming with extraordinary, rollicking stories of his business career, of making millions off a deal and of champagne-soaked dinners with the billionaire Richard Branson.

I am 37, if I go to a first date with somebody my age or older and they talk too much I am suspicious. I mean, come on, you are single at a difficult age – if you do not look like Chris Hemsworth, all that confidence must be fake. If it is not, you are very detached from reality, and that is a huge red-flag. And if you try to woo me with your billion-dollar business stories, I will take it with a grain of salt and even be very weary of you. I know money is power, and people with money are powerful, it’s a little bit scary for me to interact with you, because if our interactions go sideways and you turn out to be a vengeful bastard, those money you brag about might come in handy for making my life miserable. I also grew up with a father always bragging about money he did not have, so I’m pretty reluctant to believe people bragging about money.

The lady that is first mention in the article, gave him 160.000$ two months after they met online. So, they barely ever saw each other, and barely could call this… dating. Two questions here: who asks somebody for 160.000$ after dating only for two months? And in what world do you live in, that somebody asking you for so much money is normal? And ok, three questions, who gives somebody they barely know 160.000$?
Maybe I’ve never been so rich that 160.000$ were pocket money. But when I will be, I promise you, I won’t give it away to a person I barely know. Why? Because if I ever get to have that kind of money, it will be through my own work and believe me, when the money you have has been accumulated through hard work and blood and sweat you wouldn’t give them away that easily. It’s basic human nature and survival instinct.

I just read that article, and I cannot think of a real reason why grown up, smart and rich women would give away money to a guy they barely know. I mean, I’ve felt lonely before, but if I have to pay for somebody’s company and love, I’d rather pay for a male escort. Or more than one.

I have been hurt a lot during my lifetime, so you can blame my skepticism and my defensiveness on that. But I cannot imagine that people with a decent childhood have no awareness of the world they live in at all. They must know that there are people that do not abide by society rules, and that hurt and take advantage of other people, especially people with what we call “a good soul”. But… how naive can you be?

If you take your time and read that article, you will fond the following statistic:

In the U.S. in 2019, some 25,000 people reported being the victim of online romance scams, with losses estimated at more than $200 million (U.S.). In Canada in that same year, 760 Canadians lost $22.5 million to romance scammers, according to the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre and the RCMP. In both countries, according to the FBI, romance scams now constitute the highest-loss form of consumer fraud.

So I must ask, what the actual fuck? I mean, all I can think is that the scammed people have serious issues that a psychologist should treat. I mean, I know we should give people the benefit of the doubt, we should still trust people, even after traumatic events, but maybe a little skepticism and self-preservation is not such a bad thing. And yeah, I know we want to protect our children, and keep them innocent and hopeful, but some skepticism and self-preservation might be good for them in the long run. So that they won’t be taken advantage of by scammers, when they are in a vulnerable time of their lives.

But, what do I know? Fortunately, I’m not rich enough to be a target for these kinds of scams and I’m not suffering from loneliness enough to pay to alleviate it.

Stay safe, stay happy, and develop your skepticism muscle!

Oct 05 2020

I did it

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 12:56

I did it my friends, I managed to get my Twitter account suspended restricted. And because I am not ashamed of it and I consider I did not do or say anything wrong, I am sharing you the message I got from them and the message that did it.

This is why I am reluctant about AIs. That message was not a hate message. It was not even mentioning them directly as being stupid and deserving to die. I did not wish president Trump’s  death, because I am a pretty decent human being. My message was just a conclusion after seeing all other twitter messages directed at president Trump. There is a Central American saying that goes along the line of “If one person tells you you‘re drunk, and you feel fine, ignore him. If ten people tell you you‘re drunk, go and have a lie down”.

My message is quite analogous to that. But an AI does not know the difference. And an AI deciding my message was is the best scenario, actually.

The more terrifying scenario is that Twitter is being censored and the rules are made by those with a lot of money and no moral compass.

Welcome to 1984.

Stay safe, stay happy!

P.S. And in case it was not obvious: I do not want Trump to die, this is a too easy for him. I want him to stay alive and be able to see the US turning its back on him and prosecuting him for all the shit he has done. I want him to be stay alive to see his family shunned and giving up the name to clean hemselves of the stain he has put on his legacy. This fate that I wish for him is so much worse and this one would deserve a Twitter ban/account limitation.

Also, I appealed. Let’s see if I get a human to read that tweet. But I won’t delete it. I did not offend anyone, I did not instigate to violence. There is no reason whatsoever for me to delete my tweet. If I have to give up using twitter or creating a new account, so be it. But I won’t bow down to unfair censorship.

[Later edit]: My account got unlocked. I have a new found respect for people doing the job of reviewing shit posted on the internet and doing jobs AI are just not suited for.

Sep 26 2020

The nineteenth year

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 0:34

Every September I start thinking of you, randomly, here and there. You pop up in my mind how you used to be, how I remember you. But every year that passes my memories of you are more and more distorted probably, and some of them are totally missing. And I don’t know if I’m crying because you are not here, or because my memories of you are slowly disappearing.

People say young love is not really love, since it is based on growth hormones going rampant in a teenage body. But quite a few years have passed since I was twelve and I know the way I love changed a lot. I am colder now, more rational and I run away at the first sign that my feelings impair my rational thinking. The tragedy of my upbringing manifests in my romantic choices never being the right ones; I am attracted to broken people as a moth to a flame.

But you, you were my first true love.
I loved you without any consideration for who you were and where you came from.
I was interested in where you grew up and school you went to because I was looking for things we could have in common even if you were from miles away.
I loved you so much I never thought of the man you would be, never lost time to think about your potential to keep a steady job or how you would be as a father.
My love for you was so innocent and pure and not tainted by society rules, opinions on what love should be. I had nothing to compare it to and I was not interested in doing so.
I loved you with a love so true, that nothing else mattered in this world, but your happiness.

After you were gone, I’ve seen you in a few people, but they all ended up disappointing me by … not being you. It was unfair and fucked up of me to expect them to be in the first place. But I didn’t do it intentionally, I would just catch a glimpse of their eyes, or a crooked smile and I would see you. And I was reminded that you are no longer here, but couldn’t help thinking that parts of you are still here.

If there is a heaven and a hell, I think this life that we are living must be hell, because all the persons that are genuinely good and kind and could make this world better, seem to disappear before they have the chance to make a lasting impact. And that leaves us, the bad ones, to struggle to make this world better and failing at our mission. It’s like the Devil plays this sick game with some of us, making us meet these wonderful persons to give us hope and then crushing it by taking them away.

Heh… oh well, as long as I’m still here I’d better make it interesting. I still miss you though.

Stay safe, stay happy!

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