Jan 06 2017

Aventurile neștiute ale unui filtru de aspirator

Category: Funny,Romanian postsIuliana @ 0:15

Acum doi ani și ceva m-am mutat în Sibiu. Am venit aici cu un laptop, un telefon, o pisica și un maldăr de haine. Orice am avut nevoie după, am cumpărat. Prima achiziție a fost un aspirator Gorenje fără sac, pentru că pot face multe lucruri, dar să locuiesc într-o casă cu praf  nu e unul dintre ele. Am folosit aspiratorul ăla destul de mult și având în vedere că am pisică, e clar este foarte util și necesar. Numai că la un moment anul trecut, am remarcat că dispăruse filtrul de praf. Aspiratorul are doua filtre: unul din hârtie, unul din burete. Cel din burete este foarte util pentru că previne îmbâcsirea celui de hârtie și de asemenea poate fi spălat. Normal că îmi venea să îmi trag palme, pentru că era clar că am reușit să arunc filtrul ăla când am golit containerul de praf.

Din când în când îmi aduceam aminte de filtrul ăla și mai dădeam o tură prin Dedeman sperând să găsesc unul de cumpărat. Dar n-am avut noroc. Cred că le-am menționat și colegilor de la serviciu faptul că nu îmi aduc aminte când am reușit să rătăcesc filtrul și că îmi caut altul. Într-un final, în decembrie anul trecut am cedat nervos și mi-am comandat de pe emag niște filtre pentru un alt model de aspirator, pe care urma să le cosmetizez să se potrivească cu modelul meu de aspirator. Desigur, încă nu am apucat să fac asta, pentru că următoarea zi de curățenie pentru mine este ziua de 7 ianuarie, deci probabil operațiunea ar fi urmat să aibă loc în dimineața acelei zile.

Dar n-a mai fost să fie. Azi întorcându-mă de cosmeticiană, intru pe poartă și observ că toate containerele de gunoi sunt aranjate frumos la locul lor. De obicei mă uit la ele doar de la dreapta la stânga, când ies din casă să duc gunoiul și trebuie să îl sortez. Dar astăzi din nu știu ce motiv, m-am uitat la ele când am intrat în curte, de la stânga la dreapta și atunci l-am observat. În colțul din stânga al suportului pe care stau containerele, plin de praf și semințe de plante, stătea chircit filtrul meu de aspirator. Nu mi-a venit să cred. Se zice că găsești mereu ceea ce ai nevoie atunci când încetezi să cauți, dar totuși… Să apară filtrul aspiratorului la un an distanță de la dispariție? Știu sigur că e al meu, dimensiunile și culoarea se potrivesc. Nu pot decât să mă întreb decât cum naiba a scăpat de curățenia făcută de proprietară până acum? Pentru că știu sigur că s-a făcut curățenie în curte de câteva ori anul ăsta.

Așa că l-am ridicat cu două degețele, l-am spălat bine și acum e pregătit din nou de muncă. După un an de sabatical.

Morala poveștii: good things come to those who wait, but sometimes all you need is a blast from the past.


Oct 11 2016

We are all mad in one way or another

Category: English posts,FunnyIuliana @ 1:12

When I was little I wanted to be an astronaut. Why? Because I grew up with positive stories in which good deeds were always compensated with good deeds, in which love was always reciprocal and villains were always punished. The reality was different, my reality was brutal. There were no princesses, no dragons and villains got away most of the times, but there was a promise of hell. Yeah, that made me sleep better.

So I wanted to be an astronaut, I really wanted to leave this bloody planet behind.

Then I grew up and reality has gotten even more unfair. My solution? Get lost in books, dreams and in my own mind. So I decided I wanted to write my stories and share them with the world. That did not work either. Then I thought I could be a doctor and save people and do good deeds like the heroes in my stories. That did not happen either.

I am now an engineer, a software engineer. And although many people might say this is not so great, I know better. My talent and passion to understand how things work, to take them apart, replacing bad parts and put them together again fits so well with my job that it scares me sometimes. I am not the greatest software engineer in the world, I am not the greatest programmer either. As an Architect, I consider myself quite mediocre. But I have this yearning of getting from A to B, this obsession of always finding a solution, that does not go away until the deed is done. There is this fulfillment in finding a solution after a struggle and a lot of research that I can compare it to an orgasm, an intellectual orgasm.

Call me mad, call me workaholic, I really don’t care. I just had three intellectual orgasms today, so I’ m going to bed satisfied. This is what I call an awesome Monday.


Oct 02 2016

An innocent joke

Category: Funny,MiscellaneousIuliana @ 21:32

It is a myth that birthmarks are where you were wounded when you died in a previous life.

Christians, I have very good news for you. I have a birthmark on one of my palms and one right under my left breast, therefore I am Jesus.


Sep 29 2016

What means to be a good programmer

Category: English posts,Funny,TechnicalIuliana @ 20:18

A few weeks ago this picture appeared on my Facebook wall.
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And it got me thinking. Are programmers that special? We really do programming just because it is fun? And what actually means to be a good programmer? Because in 10 years of experience in this field I had the occasion to work with really good programmers that were really awful people and good people that were not that good programmers, but they were easy to work with.

So then, what makes a programmer good? His ability to write an algorithm? His ability to improve it? His ability  to work in a team? His ability to write stable, extendable, testable and maintainable code? What means to actually be a good programmer?

Because if good programmers write code for fun, this means that I am actually a good runner, because I run for fun. It also means I am a good dancer because I dance for fun. This also makes me a good comedian, because I make my friends laugh for fun. And so on. And what happens when I have a bad day and I write code and hate doing it? Does this make me a bad programmer?

I am not looking the define what a good programmer is. Because programming is not about having fun. Bill Gates did not do it for fun. Steve Jobs did not do it either, I assure you. They did it because they have inferred the potential of technology when used properly. Programming is about making the technology do the work for you. The better you are at it, the more work it will do for you. So fuck it, I do not want to be a good programmer! Because I do not program for fun, not 90% of the time. I program to improve my life and others’ too.

I do not want to be a good programmer, because I want to be an excellent programmer. And if I succeed I want my work and my effort to be recognized, I want to be adulated by the public and I do expect to get properly remunerated.


Sep 05 2016

How do you recognize applications created by me?

Category: English posts,Funny,TechnicalIuliana @ 21:02

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Well… There will always be that user, called gigi.pedala, that I probably created when  I was pissed off that something did not work as I intended…

Who is Gigi Pedala? In Romania Gigi Pedală, also known as Dorel is the guy creating trouble, that knows nothing (and he is nothing like John Snow) and most of the time does nothing. Except trouble. That he does.


Aug 04 2016

When he tells you he is thinking about your eyes…

Category: FunnyIuliana @ 22:25

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May 21 2013

Office war

Category: English posts,Funny,TechnicalIuliana @ 15:15

So… sometime in December I was assigned to a new project. The project was new for me, in fact it is about 6 years old, a few outsourcing teams worked on it and now me and my colleagues started working with the last team to … make it better. So these guys are sometimes doing rookie mistakes, and apparently nothing can convince them that it is not ok to break the build or commit sources that don’t compile and other small stuff like that.

So every time one of them does something that is shouldn’t I search for a Ryan Gosling picture on this site and sent the link on the main chat with a special dedication. But sometimes, the pictures available on the site are not enough. So these are my two creations for my colleagues, for now. But I intend to keep you updated. :)