Oct 09 2016

Iuliana’s log, Stardate 13341.19

Category: English posts,PersonalIuliana @ 19:56

I am going through a weird period, I am not in the mood of doing anything. It’s like I’m trying to destroy a part of myself and failing. I do not like my job anymore and have the feeling of wanting to run away. Last week I almost did it. I was just coming back from shopping and instead of going home I just took the highway route and went to the nearest town. There I stopped my car and thought about it for a while. Will somebody miss me? What will my project manager say? What will happen to my cat? And this is where my thoughts stopped. The damn cat. I am sure I could pay some people to take care of her. But  it won’t be me. And she’s my cat, she has been with me for so long. She is so committed to me, and all I give her is food, a roof over her furry head and some hugs and cuddles now and then. I am giving her so little, less than I have ever given to somebody else. And she stuck around. She found me worthy to be around. If I ever leave, I have to think it through and make sure I take her with me. She is hairy and smelly and sometimes annoying, but I love her to bits.

I just came back from karate camp, two days of mediocre food, training and conferences about human energy and such, which I call mumbo-jumbo for short. I did not make any new friends, just brought the ones I had closer.

And now I am back home, I’m behind with the book and totally out of motivation, because … well, I don’t know. I just lack the discipline to get the job done. No idea how to change this state I’m in. If you have any idea, throw some in my direction. K. Thx. Bye!

Stay safe, stay happy!

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