Mar 03 2017

Full speed ahead

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 21:44

Tonight I left work quite late. I’ve been struggling with a performance issue and an infinite loop in some code that was written years ago, that was undocumented, written in a very high cohesive manner and almost impossible to test, not unless you were willing to make a deal with the devil and selling a piece of your soul that is.

I like challenges, I like complicated people, I like complicate problems, but working on this task has drained me. While working on this task I thought about quitting a thousand times. And then I quit that idea. I love writing code, providing solutions, but this was not it. This was sisific work. And after all this time, finally one of the colleagues that has worked with this code from the beginning came in and saved the day. I am glad he did, because I could barely sleep while being haunted by that infinite loop, and when I did I had nightmares about being fired because I could not make it work.  Honestly, I don’t know why there is a team working with that code, because lately everyone working with that code managed to break something. Except for this guy, he is the only one that actually can make any change on it work.

And while torturing myself mentally and felling like the shittiest developer/architect/IT professional ever, I was offered the possibility to switch slowly to managing. When my manager told me on Tuesday that I have to get used to the idea that I won’t be writing code anymore, I was reluctant about it. But now, not so much. I am tired and I am disappointed. And most of all I realized that I do not want to code like this. I am sick of coding as a sanitary fish, to patch and fix POC’s of genius minds, that can solve complex problem, but they cannot share their knowledge. I like to think my architectures thoroughly, I like to write design documents and UML schemas. I like to write my tests simultaneously with my code.  This is the way I want to code. If I can’t do it this way, well… I’d rather not do it at all.

So yeah, I’m gonna write books and design projects the way I like to do it. And when it comes to company work, soon, it will be management. And if that does not work, I’ll just sell all my belongings and go travel the world until I’m left without money. And then I’ll just climb on top of  a high peak over the sea and jump, and end my life with a fast flight and a big splash.

Stay safe, stay happy!

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