Jul 29 2018

The cat lady

Category: MiscellaneousIuliana @ 15:25

A few days ago, I read a blog postĀ  written by one of my fellow bloggers that saddened me a little. I won’t link it because it is written in Romanian and as I am aiming for a wider audience, it is quite useless.

He was telling a story about how he noticed three ladies in the queue of the super market buying cat food and he started drawing conclusions about the fact that they were probably loners that refused men for superficial reasons and ended up with a cat or more.

I have a cat. I’ve had many throughout the years. The reason for it is that I really love animals, but cats are the only ones that can deal with me being away from home for 10 hours per day. Also, all my childhood I wanted a pet, I kept bringing home kittens I found thrown by irresponsible owners at the garbage dump and my parents kept making them disappear. And then when we moved to the countryside, they never spayed the cats, but disposed of the kittens in the most brutal ways. And the old cats, or cats that were deemed unworthy, because they weren’t catching mice, were abandoned in near by woods, or villages. I never approved, but they did not care.

So yeah, I guess I volunteered at a animal shelter for 5 years because of guilt. And I took cats (and dogs sometimes) off the street and took them to the vet and found them owners because of that guilt as well. And I did not abandon this cat and I moved her twice with me, last time to Scotland because of the same reason. The funny thing is I was in a relationship when I got this cat. And my boyfriend at the time loved her just as much as I did. But he had to move to Prague for a job and he was in a difficult situation, so he could not even start negotiating with me to keep it. I had another relationship after that. It did not work out, because we just … did not fit, I guess, but we were to young and stupid to figure it out.

But the cat is not some kind of a consolation prize, or some kind witch mark deeming me unable to have a relationship. More than that, we’ve been together since 2007 and we have gone through a lot of hardship together. And cats are not like dogs, always supportive, understanding, easy to tame, always in a good mood. CatsĀ  can be sassy, cats can be annoying and even violent sometimes. That fact that I can deal with her behavior and not kick her to the curve proves exactly the opposite.

I’ve had one cat the last 11 years, this does not make me a cat lady. This does not make a crazy man hater bitch. But this reduces my dating pool for sure. Because a possible partner must accept the fat furry creature that pukes sometimes, hisses sometimes, acts like the house owner, shits in the house and when it gets sick, it costs a lot to get her better.

And I accept this responsibility. I think I’ve written this here before. If the intelligence of a cat is that of a 4 years old, then the cat can be compared to an autistic 4 year old, because she clearly has difficulties in communicating and can be quite difficult sometimes. Would you abandon a 4 year autistic child? Because I wouldn’t. So I accept all the consequences of having this cat even if this means reducing my chances of being in a relationship.

It does not mean that I hate men(or people), or I am crazy or mean. And it feels a little unfair to be labeled as such.

Stay safe, stay happy!

Leave a Reply