Damned if you do, damned if you don’t

In between the breaks of watching the news and providing emotional support my friends and family in Romania, although I have no idea if I’m doing a good job there, I managed to get some work done.  Until the conflict in Ukraine ends, one way or another, I’ll probably be slightly unproductive. I’m already falling behind with the work on my new book, because I am finding it hard to keep my focus.

People being killed on camera at this point and the “leaders” of the civilized countries are discussing. DISCUSSING. Like this was just a movie you can state your opinions about and then go about your day. It makes me sick to my stomach.

When I watch those films, I get sick to my stomach because of my own helplessness to do anything. The best I could do was to close my Revolut account. The next thing I am doing is looking for a way to donate for medical aid and military to Ukraine, but I have no guarantee that my money will end up where they should, of would even matter. Because ultimately, I am not in a position of power. I know every small act matters, but people are still dying, and I feel guilty for not being in the position to do more.

I FEEL GUITLY, what is happening in Ukraine is not my fault and I do not approve it. I feel just as useless as the politicians talking and talking and ultimately doing nothing. I hate myself for doing exactly the same thing they are doing. But they do have the power to do something, and they don’t.

And I get it. If they don’t help, their people that feel exactly as I do, they will condemn them and have their revenge at the polls in the next elections. If they help, that help with eventually consist in people that must be sent to fight and might not come back. Those people have families that will not forgive them either, and they will have their revenge at the pools in the next election too. So, what would you do?

I know what I would do. I would say: Fuck my political career, I will save as many people as I can. Nobody will make me a statue, but I will be able to sleep at night knowing that I did the best I could.

I am not in the position to make a decision like that, I am only a meek, unsignificant keyboard warrior.

Stay strong Ukraine! Слава Україні!

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